If I sit down and actually think about something that’s been on my mind a lot recently, it’s that my daughter who is 6 is in a brand new phase of her development. A phase that makes me feel a little queasy at times. It’s something that crops up daily at the moment, sometimes fading away into the background but always there.
I’ve talked a bit in recent posts about her ‘first’ real experience of going out to “Trick or Treat” a couple of weeks ago, her ‘first’ real experience of Diwali last week, and this weekend, it’s been her ‘first’ outing with her friend for an afternoon out, supervised by her friend’s mum of course! But, without me.
This isn’t to say that she only ever goes out with me or her dad. Quite the opposite, she’s always been independent, happily spending time with grandparents, cousins and various family members. She’s always off out on school trips and before that nursery trips. But to spend time away from family isn’t something we’ve had much of at all. I mean she is only 6!
Shreya’s never been one for attachment issues ever since I can remember. In many ways it’s made life so very easy. Especially since Sajjan is very reliant and struggles to spend time anywhere without us! So, just recently I’ve been hit with the reality that our daughter isn’t that little anymore and naturally felt I should document that within a blog post. It also happens to be my introduction blog post!! So, anyone reading this that feels it’s not up to scratch please don’t judge me too hard…anyway, I digress..
We all say it when our babies turn into toddlers, when they become threenagers and then when they start school….but this stage, this 6-7 stage for me has been the one that’s really made me think how far we are from where we started wayyyy back in 2012. Even the clothes are more expensive after age 6! Why do retailers do that? Put the cost up of an item that’s aged 6 but the exact same one that’s aged 5 is cheaper???
Silly things like not being able to shop in the 0-5 section at Next to the more upsetting reality that they can’t be fooled with what’s real and what’s imaginary. Is this the last year she will believe in Santa? All those questions are present in my mind now more than ever before.
Those first few years with your ‘first born’ are so transient, even more so than with your second child I feel as your second remains your baby always! There will be lots of mums reading this that might feel differently – it’s just my personal experience. I’d love to know your thoughts after reading this, that’s if you even got this far down my post .
For me, in someways i’ve been more mindful of the milestones at this age, more so than the crawling, walking and talking ones. Yes, these changes are more subtle than those hugely more celebrated milestones like walking and oh, potty training (that’s another massive one) – but these ‘new big kid years’ have been the biggest eye opener so far. So, I’ll leave my rambling here and end on a positive, I’ve been feeling a little sensitive about all the ‘lasts’ but have purposefully tried to highlight all the ‘firsts’ of this new stage for Shreya. It’s made me feel less queasy when I look at how every new experience means she’s developing cognitively, socially and emotionally for the better. And I feel so proud to be a part of that!
Great blog Sandeep. I agree it is a strange stage. Sometimes I glimpse at Ellie and think, ‘where has my baby gone?’ I do think it’s different with your second though. Ellie is 7 next month, but her sister is 4 years older. I still see her as very much a little girl, more so than I did Lucy at a similar age. I think she will still believe in Santa for many years, and still has the excitement and wonder of a little one. Some days I just want her to calm down, grow up and be more mature, but I know that I’m going to miss this crazy stage so much when it’s over!
Thanks Jane! I still see Shreya as my little girl too, but just see these glimmers of times ahead and it’s a little frightening! Someone today told me that she’s still got a few years yet to believe in Santa. Made me feel much happier ??